How to grieve the divorce and then move on
No one can tell you how to grieve your divorce or if you need to grieve.
Each person experiences divorce in his or her own way. So, if you are telling yourself you should be
feeling this way or feeling that way – stop.
One of the best ways to grieve a divorce is to have a good attorney. Select an attorney whom you think is right for you (notice that I didn’t say an attorney you FEEL is right for you).
When going through a divorce, you may have confused feelings, and your thinking brain needs to help you make some decisions.
You may have many conflicting thoughts or feelings before, during, and after a divorce.
Friends can be good listeners. However, if you want to talk with a professional, seeking a therapist who has expertise in divorce-related issues may be helpful. Having a clinician who will listen and ask pertinent questions can be essential in gaining clarity for the task
of decision-making with your attorney.
Many people do not need or want a therapist during a divorce, and each person and situation is different.
In fact, sometimes the grieving comes before or after a divorce. If you think, however, your grief is keeping you from doing the things you reasonably need and want, it may be time to consider talking with a professional.
Sarah Wilhelms, MSW, LCSW, is a licensed clinical social worker in Missouri. She has a bachelor of arts degree with honors and a Master of Social Work with honors, both from
Washington University in St. Louis. Sarah has been a social work clinician over 15 years, with professional experience in family custody and visitation matters, grief and loss, foster care and adoption, healthcare, child development, developmental and learning disabilities, and trauma.
For more information, you may contact her at 314-605-9635.